What is dearmouring and how can it make me feel pleasure in your pussy like you never imagined!
Dearmouring is a Sex Magic practice that is thousands of years old. And when I explain to you what it is, it’s no wonder that this practice is not common in our society, because it can literally solve most of our sex problems including vaginismus and once you learn it and practice it, you’ll have the skill for life!
A little bit of context first for the point of Dearmouring.
So we live in a sex-negative society. And on top of shaming us for sex and pleasure, our society is also violent towards women and those who are cultured as women in our society.
So if you are a women or vulva beings in this world, you either have experienced acute direct trauma, like sexual assault, or you experience ongoing trauma of living in a society that is violent against your body, which is like death of 1000 paper cuts.
It racks up!
And so, with the culmination of that, we really all have the same basis of the problem of not enjoying sex and pleasure to our fullest in our body, even if it shows up in our lives in different ways.
We may experience; numbness, pain, rejection of wanting to date altogether, not wanting to masturbate, thinking it’s shameful, becoming hyper-sexual where we don’t even enjoy it anymore, no embodiment, not being able to speak up for our needs, not even knowing how to explore what our needs or wants are, suppressing our queerness, the list goes on and on!
The basis of the problem is that our nervous system does not feel safe to experience incredible pleasure in our body.
Because our nervous system works with pain and pleasure and if we know pain so well, we’re gonna end up numbing out and we’re not really going to pleasure to the extent that we are biologically wired for.
Instead seeking pleasure for escapism. For example; drugs and alcohol, but that’s a whole other article to write.
So the process of dearmouring is working with specific physical points on our vulva or inside our vagina to “disarm” these points.
Have you heard of the body keeps the score?
The gist of it is that our nervous system and our physical body holds tension that is associated to our emotional trauma.
The practice of dearmouring is creating safety in our nervous system by going very very slowly and finding these particular tension points and spending some time with them to release that tension and emotions.
Yes, it’s like a massage but it’s much more about attunement and focus and letting any emotions release from that place!
It is absolutely my favourite exercise, even though it is very vulnerable to do it is my favourite because it so strongly teaches you a very tangible result of your body "keeping the score" and holding onto trauma. And learning how to release it yourself! Which is extremely empowering and returns us back to body sovereignty like nothing else!
So if you’re curious about dearmouring, I have a whole lecture on it and a guided practice inside the coven.
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